Barns, Blood and Rock and Roll Read online

  “What?” April said still brushing her hair.

  Candice released gas into the smelly old porcelain shitter.

  “God Candy,” April laughed out loud.

  Candice explained, “Excuse me but I never fart in front of Devin. I’ve been holding it in all night. Now let’s go pay a visit to our little googly eyed friend.”

  “Please Allison, can you just take their order. Please don’t make me go out there.” The look on sixteen year old Cindy Andersons face was that of sheer terror at the sight of Devin sitting in his Camaro in the parking lot. If there ever was a dream guy for Cindy it was Devin; Mr. star quarterback with the almost shoulder length sandy blonde hair and dreamy blue eyes. Cindy would shyly smile at him in the hallways at school and her heart would race when he’d smiled back giving her a look that he was somewhat interested and that he would love for a chance to talk to her. But that idea was shot down today when Candice slid up behind him and put her arms around his waist, all while chewing and popping her bubblegum very obnoxiously and giving Cindy a nasty, dirty look. Don’t be staring at my man you lame dumb fuck. Go back to your little art class.

  Cindy bit her bottom lip nervously as she looked out the large window of the Freeze it, still trying to convince her co-worker Allison to go take their order.

  “Now is your chance kid. Don’t be a chickenshit,” Allison laughed. “It’s just a boy Cindy.” It was easy for Allison to say because she was nineteen, not sixteen and sweating bullets at the moment like Cindy.

  “Would somebody just take their order for Christ sakes?” Ray, their manager said bitterly.

  Allison nudged Cindy but she was a statue standing there in the noisy kitchen area of sizzling burgers and milkshake machines. Cindy knew she couldn’t go out there after what happened earlier today at school, because of what that evil witch in the gaudy makeup and six inch, ugly brown platform shoes did to her. A lump formed in her throat at the memory of how Candice and April cornered her outside of her art class. She pinned her to the wall and got in her face telling her to keep her goddamn puppy dog eyes off of her man. “He likes this too much baby,” Candice had told her as she took Cindy’s hand and thrust it into the middle of her tight red shorts.

  Before Cindy knew what was happening, she felt herself being pushed out of the door by Allison telling her to go take their order. Once she was outside she felt naked and feeling like a dork in her ‘Freeze it’ uniform and apron. Cindy loved art and liked to read and wore glasses and had classic straight brown ’76 style hair, but underneath what she believed to be a plain jane was a very pretty girl. Anyone with eyes could see it, only hers didn’t.

  She took a deep breath and told herself to quit being such a baby. She slowly walked up to Devin’s Camaro. Her legs felt shaky as she walked and she could feel sweat forming under her arms. Did I remember to put deodorant on? She did. With as much courage as she could summon in herself, she went up to his car, hoping and praying that Candice wasn’t sitting in the front seat. A great relief came over her when she saw Russ, his best friend. Then she quickly scanned the backseat. No one there honey. The mean witch is stinking up the bathroom right now. You’re safe for now. The window was rolled down and Devin was slouched in his seat resting his head in the palm of his hand. He looks so bummed out, she thought, and then, “Hi guys, are you ready to order.” Devin looked up at the sound of her voice. Much to Cindy’s surprise his eyes seemed to brighten when he saw her. She got the feeling that he was happy to see her. She hoped that he was.

  “Hey,” Devin said with an awkward slow type of wave to her, but he was smiling.

  “Hey,” Cindy responded shyly and she was smiling to. She bit at her bottom lip nervously.

  “You go to my school right?” Devin asked her.

  “Um yeah. I’m a junior.” She tucked her hair behind her ear. “You’re a football right?” She said and then cringed at her embarrassing flub in speech.

  “What?” Devin said.

  “I mean you’re on the football team.” She could feel her face turning hot.

  “Oh. Yeah I play football’” he told her.

  Then the typical awkward silence ensued. The only sound now seemed to be those screaming kids in the Buick that were out past their bedtime. Finally Russ came to his friend’s aid and broke the ice.

  He leaned over a bit and asked Cindy, “You’re into art stuff right?”

  She let out just a small laugh. “Uh, yeah I guess. Well pottery mostly.”

  “So you make pots?” Now Devin felt the warmth of blood rushing to his face because of his stupid comment. Cindy just looked at him not saying anything. Then she laughed but it was a genuine laugh. Devin felt like an idiot.

  “I’m sorry. I’m not laughing at you it’s just I’ve never heard the art of making pottery put that way. But sure I make pots.” She laughed.

  “What can you say, he’s a jock,” Russ told her and then jokingly punched Devin’s arm.

  She laughed again and so did Devin and suddenly the tension was melting away. See honey, it’s not so bad, this whole talking to boy’s thing.

  “I’d like to see some of it sometime,” Devin told her but she didn’t understand. Her smile faded.

  “See what?” She said.

  “Your pottery.”

  Are you joking? You’re a football jock and you want to see some nerdy chic’s pottery? She couldn’t help but think.

  “You do?” She said in a stunned voice.

  “Well yeah, why not?” He said.

  Still confused she shook her head and told him, “Ok I guess.” But her smile returned. She looked bashfully at the ground.

  “Can I have your number? He asked her.

  What? Did he just ask me for my number? Mr. star quarterback.

  There was a silent gap for a moment because Cindy was dumbstruck. She looked at Devin as if he was nuts for asking for her number.

  “You ok there?” He asked Cindy.

  “Uh, what? Oh yeah I’m fine.” She said as if coming out of her daze.

  “So can I call you?” He asked.

  She could feel more sweat under her arms.

  “Sure that’s fine.” She fumbled with her notepad for taking orders and wrote down her number. She gave it to him.

  He took it. “Cool, thanks. So do you like music?”

  “Uh, yeah, most kids do.” She tucked her hair behind her ear again.

  “I just picked up the new Aerosmith today. It rocks.”

  Russ shook his head and couldn’t help but laugh at this because the album was called Rocks. Despite all the awkwardness and goofy conversation babble, Russ was glad to see his friend laughing and smiling with this new girl that was the complete opposite of the thing holding Devin down.

  Both Cindy and Devin trailed off for a few more minutes talking really about nothing. As they talked, Cindy could barely contain the excitement she was feeling inside. Things like this don’t happen to people like Cindy Anderson. Popular boys don’t ask out the shy, quiet girls. What she didn’t know, was that she was the kind of girl that Devin wanted all along. She displaced the idea that is was some kind of mean joke and just went with it. It feels good to feel good, she thought with a smile. But Cindy’s happy, warm and tingling feeling couldn’t last forever. That’s only in fairy tales. The sound of high heel shoes clicking on hot pavement came up behind her.

  “Well, if it isn’t the little play-doh girl.”

  Cindy froze and returned to her former extroverted shy self upon hearing Candice behind her.

  “Get out of my way. I’d like to get in the car.”

  Cindy stepped to her left so Candice and April could get in the car. Once they were situated in the back Candice unleashed her true colors onto Cindy.

  “Well are you gonna take our order or just stand there?”

  Cindy frowned and Devin looked away. He stared blankly at the steering wheel.

  Ok, what’ll you have?” Cindy’s voice was soft and choked like she could cry any min
ute.

  “What? Speak up pottery girl. I can’t hear you,” Candice said viciously.

  “What can I get you?” Cindy said a little louder.

  “That’s better pottery girl,” Candice remarked meanly.

  Devin had lost his appetite. He suddenly no longer wanted Delirious Dave’s Double bacon cheeseburger with onion rings anymore. Instead he just wanted hide his head and drive away. But you’re not are you Devin. You’re going to sit there and listen to what Ms. Blonde waterworks has to say to the nice girl that you deep down really like and would rather be with.

  There was an uneasy silence in the car and for good reason. Candice was pretty good at making scenes. This would be her best yet. She kicked the back of Devin’s seat.

  “Well order!” She said bitch like.

  Reluctantly he did. “Uh, I’ll just have Delirious Dave’s Double bacon cheeseburger with onion rings please.”

  Cindy began writing his order down. But it was hard to hold her tears back. A lump formed in her throat.

  “You gettin’ all that honey?” Candice wouldn’t let up. “Don’t mess our order up.”

  April giggled quietly to herself. She was Candice’s best gal crony. She and Russ then gave their orders. Cindy’s face was red with humiliation. She was on the verge of tears and Candice went in for the kill.

  “What’s the matter sweetie. Are you gonna cry?” There was amazement in her laugh.

  “You’re what sixteen right? And you’re gonna fucking cry?” She couldn’t help but laugh. And she did like the awful, lowly person she was.

  “Well don’t do it here. Go and cry to that dope head friend of yours Allison or whatever the fuck her name is.”

  Everyone was silent in the car except for April who was giggling to herself and obviously loving Candice tear Cindy apart. No one dared to tell her to stop. They all knew better. Especially you Devin, Mr. star fucking quarterback bringing home the trophy for your team in 1974, 1975 and 1976. You’re not going to say a damn thing. Because if you do its no waterworks for you tonight; let that bitch verbally rape Cindy right in front of you and don’t do anything about it. Just keep staring at your steering wheel. That will really win over Cindy won’t it? She’ll appreciate that.

  Cindy stared at Devin with tears starting to roll down her eyes. He couldn’t look at her. But he did. And then she knew by the look in his eyes that this was his world; a world of being popular and having a hot girlfriend and a hot car, and her world of art, books, and pottery couldn’t compete with that other world. His eyes told her all of this. But they also showed that he did want to tell Candice to fuck off but he couldn’t.

  Cindy turned away and began walking away from the Camaro.

  “Oh wait I almost forgot pottery girl. Get me a chocolate milkshake and please don’t get any tears in it.”

  April finally broke out into the laugh she’d been holding in. As Cindy walked away she could hear faintly but very clearly everything Candice was saying in the back seat.

  “Go cry in your pottery, fucking loser. You’re not even pretty. Hey babe can you turn some music on?” She said to Devin as if nothing ever happened. And then her lipstick case popped open.

  “Oh jesus kid, that was brutal. I’m so sorry Cindy. Are you ok?” Allison did her best to console Cindy after the verbal attack against her. “I could tell just by the way you looked out there that Candice was cutting you up pretty bad.” Allison put her hand gently on Cindy’s shoulder as she kept her head down and scooped chocolate ice cream into a large metal container. Her brown hair hung over her face, hiding her tears and embarrassment. She stopped scooping the ice cream and covered her face trying not to cry but her anguish flowed out anyway. She coughed out a cry and the tears came. “Come with me honey.” Allison took her by the arm and led her to the back storage room. They passed Ray, the owner of The Freeze it. He threw his arms up and said, “This milkshake ain’t gonna make itself ya know.”

  “Well this is emergency girl time Ray,” Allison told him with glaring eyes.

  He waved his hands at her and cursed, “Ahh shit!” and reluctantly began making the best damn milkshake Candice Moore will ever put her sweet lips to.

  Allison and Cindy went inside the small storage room behind the kitchen. It was a standard storage area with dried foods and canned goods. And also the spot for Allison to take a few hits of marijuana. Ray didn’t care just as long she didn’t fuck up people’s food or mess with the cash register. He would occasionally join her sometimes to.

  Allison closed the door and gave Cindy a hug but Cindy couldn’t hold back any longer. She let out a cry that embarrassed the hell out of her but she couldn’t help it. It only lasted a second or two but still made her feel like she was ten.

  “Shhh, it’s all right honey,” Allison told her and they both sunk to the floor holding each other. Cindy let out another cry not quite as heartbreaking as the first, but still a good cry; which is what she needed. So Allison let her.

  When she was done she sat there quietly on the floor. She felt like an idiot.

  “I’m sorry about all this Allison, me crying like a baby.”

  “Kid you shouldn’t be ashamed of crying. What that bitch did was pretty harsh. Words can hurt badly sometimes, you know.”

  Cindy sighed. “Yeah I know, but still.”

  Allison tucked Cindy’s hair back behind her ear.

  “I suppose I don’t have to ask what she said right?” God she is such a bitch; treats everyone like shit, especially Devin.” Allison cringed after saying his name. “Oh, sorry.”

  “That’s ok, she can have him,” Cindy said as she wiped some tears away from her face. She knew better though. She was just venting.

  “Now I know you really don’t mean that Cindy. You like Devin and I saw you talking to him out there before Frankenstein came walking up.”

  Cindy laughed a little at Allison’s monster reference to the lovely non-farting Candice.

  “Don’t give up on him yet ok.”

  Cindy shook her head and sniffled.

  “Hey, I know what will make you feel better.” Allison said with a mischievous smile.

  Cindy put her hands up. “Oh no, I’m not doing that.”

  Allison pulled a joint out from her pocket. “C’mon, just one hit. It ain’t gonna hurt you.” She lit it and went to turn on the small radio sitting on the floor in the corner. No matter what by Goldfinger was playing. Allison sat Indian style in front of Cindy and handed her the joint.

  “But what about Ray,” Cindy asked with a worried look.

  “Ray shmay. He doesn’t care. Besides, the shape you’re in he probably would recommend it.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Girl, put this in your mouth and hit it,” Allison commanded. And then she laughed at the sixteen year old when she coughed out a cloud of smoke. Allison was nineteen and had more life experience. Cindy was glad she was there for her now. Allison was that girl that didn’t mind writing you a late slip for study hall or giving you a joint or sneaking you out of your house to see Kiss.

  Allison took the joint from Cindy. “Whoa there kid. Take it easy. You gotta start off slow, like this.” She took a hit. “So, what do you say we dress up ol’ Candice’s milkshake, make it extra special.” Cindy’s eyes gleamed with excitement at the thought of putting bodily fluids into Candice’s milkshake. Of course they wouldn’t but it sure was fun to think about.

  “How about we sneeze in it,” Cindy said. “Or I can accidentally clip my toenails over it.” She was feeling better all ready.

  It was getting late and there were only two cars left in the parking lot of the Freeze it, one being the screaming kids in the Buick. Their parents decided they were out long enough and ice cream time was over. They left. The other was Devin’s Camaro.

  Candice belched after her last suck of chocolate shake through a red and white swirled straw.

  “That was damn good,” she said and belched again. Apparently farting wasn’t allowed in
her world but belching was perfectly acceptable.

  “So are we still on for Pete’s all-nighter?” April asked.

  “I heard he has four kegs,” Russ said with a smile. “You can count me in for sure.”

  Candice rose up and put her hands on Devin’s shoulders. She whispered in his ear. “Don’t you get to drunk tonight. I still wanna play.”

  He patted her hand and gazed at her through the rearview mirror. Her eyes spelled sex. The truth was Devon didn’t feel much like drinking tonight or hanging out or even fucking Candice, (which he couldn’t believe). He wanted to find the nearest gutter as quick as possible and drop her ass off. Then he would go to Cindy and let her see the real Devin, the one that hates living up to being Mr. Perfect fucking jock with the unbeatable football record and the ejaculating girlfriend. He would tell Cindy that he was sorry for not speaking up when his bitch girlfriend was tearing her to pieces. But you’re not going to do a damn thing are you Devin? You’re just going to keep on taking it and living a lie and pretending you enjoy being popular when all you want to do sometimes is just get stoned in your room and listen to Zeppelin 4 and read For whom the bell tolls by Earnest Hemingway and oh what a laugh fucking riot that would be for all your jock buddies knowing their star quarterback likes to read. What a pussy!

  Devin turned to Russ as if asking him what he should do. Russ nodded to the ignition.

  “Everybody ready?” Devin said with a fake smile that almost hurt on his face. Just as he began to turn the key, Allison came walking out and up to his car. Devin held off on turning on his Camaro. She knelt down by his window.

  “You all going out to Petes?” She asked.

  “Yeah, I think so,” Devin told her.

  “Sorry babe but this is a kegger not a reefer convention,” Candice said while applying more lipstick.

  “Screw you Candice,” Allison piped back. “And by the way that was a real shitty thing you did to Cindy earlier. She’s never done anything to you. She didn’t deserve that.”

  Candice could really care less about Cindy’s feelings or what Allison had to say. “Oh my little heart is breaking for poor little Cindy. Devin let’s blow this place, reefer head there is stinking up your car. God I can smell her from here.”